Phillies Spring Training: My diabetes free vacation

It took some maneuvering, we had to cash in our frequent flier miles but Kelly and I were able to give our son Cole a Christmas gift that we thought he'd never forget... Phillies spring training tickets.

I don't leave home often without my kids. Being a stay at home dad by definition means that they are almost always with me. Arden is especially always close to me, be it in distance or contact and I don't often have the opportunity to relinquish her care. Last week however was a boys week, Cole and I went to Clearwater, Florida to watch the Phillies get ready for the 2012 season while Kelly stayed at home with Arden.

This trip was to be my second diabetes free week in five years. I still maintained communication with the school nurses but after Arden arrived home from school, Kelly took the reigns. Kelly deserves a big shout out... she did a terrific job!

Our son Cole plays and loves baseball more then I'd be able to express here in a few words. An hour after we landed in Florida we were standing at the Bright House practice fields. Not five minutes after we arrived Cole turned and saw former Phillies manager, Dallas Green. His was the first signature on Cole's ball that would eventually include Mike Schmidt, Charlie Manuel and Ruben Amaro, Jr. and that signature marked the beginning of our week in the sun watching the Phillies.

We stood and watched as the players took batting practice, ran sprints, fielded their positions and more. Every few minutes a horn would sound and the guys would run to another station. Cole was enjoying himself in a way that I've never seen, his smile truly reached from ear to ear.

CLiff Lee, Carlos Ruiz

Every day around 10 am Cole would stand outside of the outfield fence and try to catch home run balls as the sailed over. After he was finished, I'd get out my glove and he and I would throw a ball. This was my absolute favorite part of the trip. Standing just outside of where his baseball idols were playing, having a catch with my son. It was so relaxing and so heartwarming. Imagine your child's favorite thing in the world, imagine being at the place where it happens and feeling so close to it that you could imagine that thing for yourself. That's what this was for Cole and I was fortunate enough to be there when he felt it.

We attended a game each day, five in all. In the evenings we'd have dinner and laugh together, never once did I wonder how many carbs were in the food we were eating. It was nice not to think about diabetes. One evening at dinner I consciously thought, "this is wonderful... not having to look across the table, trying to guess how many carbs are in Arden's meal". The good feeling that accompanied that thought only lasted a moment because my follow up thought was so incredibly sad. I found myself pondering the idea that Arden would never experience this feeling as long as diabetes was a part of her life. I felt an incredible guilt for being able to escape diabetes when Arden isn't able to do the same. Those thoughts and feelings were incredibly sobering, they literally showed me where the term, "feels like a wet blanket" came from. I instantly felt the weight of her reality, I realized that Arden likely won't feel this release for a very long time, if ever.

Type I has given me a heightened perspective, I feel like knowing just how difficult life can be with diabetes allows me to properly put other situations into their place. I used that perspective, summoned up the resilience that diabetes has given me and shook off that terrible notion. I turned my attention back to our dinner conversation and was able to separate what was happening in my life in that moment from what I knew was happening in Arden and Kelly's back home.

Spring training was a marvelous experience, one that we may try to do again one day. I want to thank the Phillies Director of Public Affairs, Scott Palmer for the kindness he showed to Cole while we were in Clearwater. I wrote to the Phillies and told them that we were coming to spring training, I explained how often diabetes effects out lives and how wonderful Cole is at supporting his sister and patiently waiting while we treat low BGs, wait to eat and more. I expressed how much I'd like this trip to be just about Cole and that I wanted to make it extra special for him if I could. Mr. Palmer met us at our seats, spoke with Cole and gave him a ball signed by Phillies pitcher Cole Hamels. In a week full of ear to ear smiles, this moment ranked right at the top for Cole and I am grateful to Mr. Palmer and the Phillies for taking the time. 

Cole with Scott Palmer

To see more photographs from the trip please go to the Visual Record.

Made our own pots and pans moment

About an hour after I wrote 'Pots, Pans, Baseball, Fathers and Sons' I decided that Cole and I should make our way down to Citizens Bank Park to make a memory of our own. Game one of the 2011 NLDS between the Phillies and Cardinals was without a doubt the most exciting live sporting event that I have ever attended. When Ryan Howard hit this home run to put the Phillies ahead Cole was standing in front of me, I put my left arm across his chest and we jumped up and down together, screaming like maniacs... I still don't have my voice back.

I hope that everyone gets to do something like this at least once... it's unlike any other communal experience I've ever encountered.

I've added some of the pictures that I took at the game to the Visual Record, I hope you enjoy them!

Pots, Pans, baseball, fathers and sons

Chase Utley, the player Cole models himself after. Photo by me.

I grew up in a small suburb just outside of Philadelphia. My family enjoyed baseball but they weren't rabid fans. We cheered for the home team and watched some of the game's best play. There were far more bad seasons then good and only one great one... 1980 was the year that our team, the Philadelphia Phillies won the World Series. I was nine years old the night they won, I remember that I was awake past my bedtime when Tug McGraw struck out the last batter to bring the Phillies and Philadelphia fans their first ever World Series title.

What happened next is maybe one of my most found memories of my Dad. He erupted, ran to the kitchen and then outside. My father, a man that didn't show a lot of excitement normally, stood outside of my home banging pots together as if the act was going to save the world. I was confused for a moment but when I walked outside to figure out what was happening, I realized that my dad wasn't the only one abusing cookware. There was a symphony of pots clanging, it's a sound that I never imagined existed before that moment and it filled the night air as if the noise was playing over a stadium loudspeaker. The celebration seemed to go on forever and it felt like joy channeled through pots and pans.

As the years passed I stopped watching and following baseball, I'd lost the passion for the game and I never really considered going back to it, until 2008. Now I know what you are thinking... that I jumped back on the bandwagon but my return to baseball didn't have anything to do with my wanting to watch Major League Baseball. I started watching again for my son, Cole.

Cole has been playing baseball since he was four (he's eleven now), we could see since he was two years old that he may have an talent for the game. Kelly asked me to sign him up early even though I wanted to wait until he was five. She said, "he's so good at it... we should let him play" - and she was right!

Sometime in 2008, about four years after Cole began playing baseball I noticed that he sometimes, despite his natural ability, looked a bit lost. Then it hit me, "we don't watch baseball, how would he know?". So I turned on the television and you know what I saw... the Philadelphia Phillies were a really good baseball team - I honestly didn't know. Initially we watched so he could see situations and understand the flow of a game better. Initially.

Three years later Cole and I watch baseball together a lot, we go to the Phillies games when we can and share the game in a way that may defy understanding unless you're a father or a son. It turns out that it's not the game that I loved as a child, it was watching it with my dad.

Citizens Bank Park 2010

We've seen some amazing baseball together but I've most enjoyed watching him play. Cole is a five time all-star in our town, an amazing outfielder, a wonderful middle infielder and he plays in a way that any fan would appreciate. I've never had to remind Cole of a game or a practice, he doesn't complain about the heat in the summer or the cold and rain in the fall. He constantly turns down offers to play other sports so that he can play as much baseball as he can squeeze in. He's a fantastic player and an even more amazing son.

Lead off double - Fall 2011

I'm telling you about all of this because baseball deserves for me to...

The other night we left Cole's practice and rushed home to watch the last 2011 regular season Phillies game together. The girls had the living room television when we arrived so we went upstairs to my room and turned on the game. The Phillies were down 3-1 when we turned on the TV. I told Cole that I had a good feeling that they'd find a way to win since they were playing to set the franchise record for wins in a season (102). Cole moved close to me and put his head on my chest like he did when he was much younger. We laid there together and watched as the game went into extra innings, it reminded me of how we'd nap together when he was a baby. 

2002, the first year we saw him swing a bat

It's been said a million times before but bears repeating, there is something magical about baseball. I'm going to post this now and then go to the field to watch Cole play this afternoon. When we get home tonight our entire family will watch the Phillies play game one of the NL Division Series against the Cardinals. Hopefully in a few weeks, I'll bang some pots together with my son. 

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Update on Saturday, October 1, 2011 at 1:53PM by Scott Benner

Writing this really got my sentimental juices flowing... so I grabbed some last minute tickets and Cole and I are going to the game tonight. I'll try to post some pictures later. Let's go Phillies!

Update on Monday, October 3, 2011 at 10:52AM by Scott Benner

Pictures are up in the Visual Record and the video that I was able to shoot of Ryan Howard's home run accompanies my follow up to this post. 

Opening Day

Today is the official start to the 2011 MLB baseball season but major leaguers aren't the only ones that start throwing the ball around this week. It’s estimated that 50 million boys and girls play Little League baseball and softball in the US alone. That’s 50 million kids between the ages of 5 and 12 running around and working up an appetite on fields all over this country. 

Arden is a softball player and her brother Cole plays on multiple baseball teams. Just like many of you we spend a lot of time on baseball fields from April to November. 

One day last season I overheard a mother talking about how happy she was that her kids were out in the fresh air and getting exercise, I turned to agree with her but when I did I saw that her son was eating cheese fries and drinking a soda. That moment gave me pause and made me consider the ridiculousness of the situation. “I’ve done same thing” I thought. When Cole gets done playing he’s ravenous and he goes to the snack stand and buys some food-like product with money that I give him and when Arden visits the stand her BGs get thrown into a tizzy. I instantly felt stupid and more then a bit hypocritical, so I decided to take a shot at enacting change.

What is months ago now I spoke to the gentleman that runs our town’s little league program and said no more or less than what I have said here, then I expressed my wish that the stand could provide better options to refuel our kids. I told him that despite my best efforts it was difficult to keep up with our schedule while packing good food to eat at the games (I’m at those fields 4 and 5 times a week). He understood and said that he’d look into it.

Fast-forward to yesterday... I received an email that I am more then a little proud to tell you about - There will be yogurt and fresh fruit available at our snack stand on opening day and if they sell maybe they’ll add more! A tiny little triumph but one that I have a lot of hope for... I want our kids to have healthy options where ever they are all most as much as I want the my home town team back in the World Series...

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The following are archived comments from this post. You can post new comments below.

Leighann of D-Mom Blog

Great work!

My kids would eat yogurt and fresh fruit at every meal and snack if I'd let them. (BOTH kids.)

Isn't it amazing how sometimes something as little as simply asking can help make change?

Now you'll have to stand by the snack bar and encourage everyone to buy the good stuff!

Wednesday, April 6, 2011 - 01:36 PM

Anna F.

Wonderful!  Hope there is still good food at the snack stands when my kids get involved in something.

Wednesday, April 6, 2011 - 03:41 PM

Wonderful Support - JDRF Walk Awards

I want this post to serve as a sincere “thank you” to all of the folks that have supported Arden’s 2010 JDRF Walk. Your kind donations do so much, they help the search for a cure, develop new and innovative therapies and technology that makes Arden’s day a bit easier and gives type I diabetics a voice in Washington. 

I wanted to make sure that you all knew about a moment that occurred today at the awards luncheon.  Arden received quite a nice treat today, she got a tour of the Phillies ball park, got to stand in the dugout and have her picture taken in some pretty cool places!

The best part of today happened in a split second, the JDRF staff said some nice words about all of the people in the room, gave them credit for being part of the search for a cure and then they named the teams. This is when the moment happened. When our team was announced, “Walk for Arden”, Arden smiled but not just because she heard her name, it was more then that. Arden got to feel today as if she is an active part in helping herself... no helpless feeling today - today she got to feel in control.  So, if you are wondering where your donation goes, I think it goes to all of the things I listed above and then it warms Arden’s heart - which in turn warmed ours. 

If you made a donation, helped with a fundraiser, told someone about this site or just stop by to read what I write... you are supporting so much. So, “thank you!”.

One last quick thing. So many of you make amazing financial gifts to the JDRF through Arden’s walk. In fact we have raised north of 40k in the four years that we’ve been doing this. <applause for you>. This year we invited Alex and his parents, Steve and Maria to come with us to the awards lunch. We wish that you all could be there but this year we had extra tickets and we wanted to try and thank one of you a little extra. Hopefully we will continue to raise enough to be invited to this event and we can make this a tradition. I don’t want o share details as to not embarrass them but sufficed to say, they do way more then they should in support of Arden’s walk and we are grateful.  

Best to all of you in this new year, hope to see you next fall for our fifth walk! Let’s end this with a cool picture of Alex kicking a huge snow ball, shall we??